A week filled with calls and emails

Oh my god, like a part-time job this week with emails and calls concerning both Freja and my work situation, some more stimulating than others if you say so.

Went to the counselor today (to our delight you get one linked to Freja's diagnosis), very nice to ventilate your incredibly smart brain with some other smart rascal ;) Got some smart advice along the way...god, I love smart people , is like sweet music to sit and listen to people who both understand my brain (speak my language) are with me and come with smart insights that are not alien at my feet but rather a confirmation of my way of thinking and my philosophy of life, also new advice unknown ear to me that is not on page 23 paragraph 19 as a standing comment that must be made to all patients because you have learned that in the textbook...oh no, here you show that you own your own brain and have a perfect approach to help, inspire and guide another person in an intellectual way. Thanks!

The head is now thicker than usual, so insanely much hanging in the air for me I feel...you are human and it is in our nature to want to know what is going on but right now I am floating and it is eating me up. ..

The feeling of throwing up your guts on the kitchen floor is very close at hand. All people deal with things differently precisely because we are different and I am currently in a stage where I stay afloat but still somehow manage to row things and happily retain my intelligence because it is needed ban me today if you will palla rowed things. Certificates here and there, repeating the story, not only to one but the feeling of repeating yourself to 31 people, you hear yourself chewing on the same thing over and over again, sometimes I feel like a UFO when I speak because you have talked so much that you forgot what you said...

I have to get help, it's fucking impossible to carry everything I'm carrying....

Freja's days need to be shortened with advice from a physiotherapist and occupational therapist because she can't take it otherwise... this week she has been to preschool a lot and she is completely done, it is hardly possible to have her and do things after 5 pm, on two occasions she unplanned fell asleep in the evening from exhaustion.

My life is thrown around a bit here and there, I feel, and you could wish that you got some support along the way regarding work, but it's too much to ask...I can't be more sad than I am if you say so.. .

I'm not going to hang anyone out because I know that I'm like a thorn in the side of some people because I say what I think and think and I can't accept when people tell lies or try to trample on me, I don't accept that ! I value honesty, it is respect for me to dare to open my mouth!

Still haven't heard anything from Gothenburg and Freja's eye, this morning she complained of pain in her eyes so for a couple of hours I tried to get hold of someone at NUS about this....there needs to be a change in our society on this strange system , it shouldn't be possible to get hold of a person to talk to on the phone anymore...is that how you want it? Queue everything you do today, you have to queue at the shithouse at home when the 15 year old takes a shower...just kidding but what do I know about eyes? Why is she in pain? What do they depend on? Yes, these are answers that only eye experts can answer, but it is terribly frustrating that it should take half a day to get hold of someone when she complains in the morning.

Well, now I'm going to help my other daughter with her hair! She has been a rock and took care of little sister today like many other days, she is worth her weight in gold and Freja loves her...Elza is my best friend she says :) Got a gift when I got home from Elza, a ritual package. ..thank you my beloved daughter, I am so proud of the person you are developing into, a humble generous, caring person. Tomorrow a hospital visit is expected for her to investigate rheumatism due to our family's hereditary situation regarding this and a joint in a finger that has been bothering her for a year now without getting better. It started the same way on my mother stuck in a toe. We'll see where it leads..also waiting for word on the genetic test she submitted about Marfan syndrome, but I don't think she has it, but you can never say never. The son must come in and hand in a test with him.

Good evening folks, thanks for sharing my thoughts!